Narcissism – Part 001

Let’s face it. Blogging about oneself is somewhat narcissistic.

Narcissism is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I embrace it heartily. And I know there are a lot of other narcissists who roam the earth. I wish they had narcissist conventions. But they would never work out as no one would really be interested in what others have to say. Can you imagine a conference workshop with the title of “How to Take Your Narcissism to the NEXT LEVEL!!“? It would be highly attended by aspiring CEO’s and dictators.

I work in a company full of narcissistic glory hogs. However, I will wait to write about my employer in a future blog post. (In case you missed it, that last sentence was a subtle device to get you to return to my blog at a later date so you can find out more about me.)

The fun thing about working for narcissists is that if I want to avoid discussing the work I am doing, I just get them to start talking about themselves. They can’t stop, and it can easily burn up the entire duration of our meeting. Then I can go back to my desk and catch up on Facebook and see if anyone has written on my wall.

To me, the ultimate anthem for narcissism is my rewrite of Paul Anka’s “Having My Baby”. With some subtle word substitutions, the main chorus goes like this (sung to the tune of “Having My Baby”).

Well I’m having my baby
What a wonderful way of saying how much I love me
Yes I’m having my baby
What a lovely way of saying I’m thinking of me

What? Haven’t heard of Paul Anka? I guess that’s a sign of me getting old. That and the fact that I am starting to smell. At least that is what my wife has been insinuating lately. I think it is her not-so-subtle device to get me to shower more than once a week.

Of course she’s kidding! I don’t think I smell, which is why I think bathing is highly overrated. But who can actually smell themselves? That’s something dogs can do because they are so limber. And I envy that.



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4 responses to “Narcissism – Part 001

  1. there are no words… and I absolutely DO validate you and appriciate you to bits.

    I noted that the title was followed by a three digit counter (part 001) which implies there can be up to 998 more to follow, and I’m already wanting to read 002 to see how the smell testing comes out!

    • Oh St. Francis. I almost missed your comment as WordPress thought it was spam. What do you think that means? Take a good long look into your heart. You are correct about the numbering system. The wonderful thing about the gift of narcissism is that it is the gift that keeps on giving.

  2. I validate this blog.

  3. awesome! (notice how I so elegantly wrote my blog address here so I can woo others to come and read about me)

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